Tim Bray mentions Edge.org's collection of "laws" and offers two of his own:
The First Law: When you’re explaining something to somebody and they don’t get it, that’s not their problem, it’s your problem.
The Second Law: When someone’s explaining something to you and you’re not getting it, it’s not your problem, it’s their problem.
I wouldn't exactly call it a "law," but I would like to offer my own contribution:
Never underestimate the importance of small talk.
I learned this lesson at a job interview. It was my second interview with the company, and I thought the first one went very well. At this second interview, I was interviewed by five people at the same time. During those few minutes that it took the five to enter one by one, there was no small talk -- there were greetings as people entered, but a lot of silence. As a result, the nervous tension never seemed to subside. The interview was the worst one I ever had in my life. The lack of small talk at the beginning was not the reason why the interview went so badly. But as I left, I remember thinking about the tension that never subsided, and it seemed very clear to me that a little small talk at the beginning could have helped a lot.
Small talk is important, because it helps to relieve nervous tension. Learn to engage in small talk at job interviews, sales meetings, or other business meetings. If it doesn't come naturally to you, take a few minutes beforehand to think of a few topics. You can always talk about the weather. You can ask a traveler how his flight went. You can ask about another person who is a mutual acquaintance. You can ask someone how long he has lived in the area. Just find something other than business.
By starting off with a couple of minutes of small talk, you can really help to get a meeting off to a good start.
Posted by Doug Sauder at January 16, 2004 07:06 AM